Every Tongue Got to Confess: Negro Folk-Tales From the Gulf States Page 3

  9Zora Neale Hurston to Charlotte Osgood Mason, August 14, 1931.

  10Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, September 20, 1928.

  11Zora Neale Hurston to Thomas E. Jones, October 12, 1934.

  12Zora Neale Hurston to Franz Boas, March 29, 1927.

  13Hurston, “Folklore and Music,” pp. 875, 892.

  14Hurston, Mules and Men (New York: HarperCollins, 1990), p. 2.

  15Zora Neale Hurston, “Characteristics of Negro Expression,” Nancy Cunard, ed., Negro: An Anthology, (1934), abridged edition, Hugh Ford, ed. (New York: Ungar, 1970), p. 27.

  16Zora Neale Hurston, Mules and Men, p. 3.

  17Hemenway, p. 111.

  18Richard Wright, “Between Laughter and Tears,” New Masses, October 5, 1937; Alain Locke, review of Their Eyes Were Watching God, Opportunity, June 1, 1938.

  19Hurston, Dust Tracks on a Road, pp. 129, 128.

  20Hemenway, p. 109.

  21Louise Thompson, as quoted by Hemenway, p. 107.

  22Contract between Charlotte Osgood Mason and Zora Neale Hurston, December 8, 1927. Alain Locke papers, Moorland-Spingarn Center, Howard University.

  23Contract between Zora Neale Hurston and Charlotte Osgood Mason; Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, March 28, 1928; and April 12, 1928.

  24Zora Neale Hurston to Dorothy West, November 1928; Zora Neale Hurston to Franz Boas, December 27, 1928; Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, spring/summer 1929; Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, October 15, 1929.

  25Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, October 15, 1929.

  26Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, October 15, 1929; Zora Neale Hurston to Franz Boas, October 20, 1929.

  27Zora Neale Hurston to Langston Hughes, April 30, 1929.

  28Hemenway, p. 133.

  29Akua Duku Anokye, Linguistic Form and Social Function: A Discourse Analysis of Rhetorical and Narrative Structure in Oral and Written African American Folk Narrative Texts, Ph.D. dissertation, City University of New York, 1991, p. 161. Dr. Anokye has done an extensive analysis of some of the folk-tales from this manuscript. I am grateful to her for her generosity in sharing her dissertation and her own story of authenticating Hurston’s manuscript along with Professor Sally McLendon and James Glenn, then senior archivist of the National Anthropological Archives at the Smithsonian.

  30I am grateful to John Homiak, archivist of the National Anthropological Archives, and to his staff, for gracious assistance with this manuscript and its history.

  A Note to the Reader

  As a fierce advocate of the folklore animating the lives of what she called “the Negro farthest down,” Hurston believed that black people had wonderful stories that the world needed to hear. The manuscript she left was titled Negro Folk-tales from the Gulf States. The title under which it is now published, Every Tongue Got to Confess, comes from a short tale in her section of Preacher tales. “Every tongue got to confess; everybody got to stand in judgment for theyself; every tub got to stand on its own bottom,” a preacher tells his congregation. Dissatisfied with being told what she’s “got to” do, “one little tee-ninchy woman in de amen corner” snaps back: “Lordy, make my bottom wider.” “Every Tongue Got to Confess” can be read in different ways. On the one hand, it suggests that everyone has something worth confessing, just as every tongue has a tale to tell. On the other hand, it begs for an ironic reading since Hurston did not believe in forced confessions—the coercions of preachers, politicians, and authorities. The phrase “Every Tongue Got to Confess” works as one of her many inside jokes about gender as well. “Don’t you know you can’t get de best of no woman in de talkin’ game?” it asks. “Her tongue is all de weapon a woman got.”* Any reader who expects to best Hurston in the talking game of her people has just been both fairly warned and also invited to play.

  Hurston’s undated manuscript appears to have been prepared for publication but not yet edited. It is evident that Hurston shuffled and reshuffled the material, adding a Table of Contents later (which is replicated on page three). The manuscript contains as many as six different pagination schemes, and her marked paginations do not generally correspond to those typed on her contents page. With few other exceptions, the manuscript is published here exactly as Hurston left it, in the order in which it was found. Hurston titled many of her tales, then crossed the titles out. This symbol† is used to indicate titles and/or text that Hurston had marked to be deleted in her original manuscript. When tales are included twice in the volume, in identical versions, the second version has been omitted and a footnote indicates where it appeared. Lists of Hurston’s sources and a listing marked “Stories Kossula Told Me,” originally placed at the front of the volume, have been moved to the appendices of this book. Hurston’s underlined words are now replaced with italics. Editorial changes indicated by Hurston are typed in the manuscript and explained in footnotes. No corrections have been made to grammar, spelling, punctuation, syntax, or dialect. The language of the tales is reproduced exactly as it appears in Hurston’s manuscript. Whenever possible, Hurston’s own glossaries and footnotes—published elsewhere—have been used to annotate folk expressions and slang.

  *Mules and Men (New York: HarperCollins, 1990), p. 3.

  Table of Contents*

  1. God Tales

  2. Preacher Tales

  3. Devil Tales

  4. Witch and Hant Tales

  5. Heaven Tales

  6. John and Massa Tales

  7. Massa and White Folks Tales

  8. Tall Tales

  9. [Mosquito and Gnat Tales]

  10. Neatest Trick Tales

  11. Mistaken Identity Tales

  12. Fool Tales

  13. Woman Tales

  14. School Tales

  15. Miscellaneous Tales

  16. Talking Animal Tales

  17. Animal Tales

  * On her manuscript, Hurston—or someone else—crossed off titles of four sections: “Massa and White Folks Tales” (originally, seventh); “Tall Hunting Tales” (originally, ninth); “Mosquito and Gnat Tales” (originally, tenth); and “Hidden Lover Tales” (originally, fourteenth). The “Tall Hunting Tales” are scattered within “Tall Tales.”

  Negro

  Folk-tales

  from the

  Gulf States

  God Tales

  Why God Made Adam Last†

  God wuz through makin’ de lan’ an’ de sea an’ de birds an’ de animals an’ de fishes an’ de trees befo’ He made man. He wuz intendin’ tuh make ’im all along, but He put it off tuh de last cause if He had uh made Adam fust an’ let him see Him makin’ all dese other things, when Eve wuz made Adam would of stood round braggin’ tuh her. He would of said: “Eve, do you see dat ole stripe-ed tagger (tiger) over dere? Ah made. See dat ole narrow geraffe (giraffe) over dere? Ah made ’im too. See dat big ole tree over dere? Ah made dat jus’ so you could set under it.”

  God knowed all dat, so He jus’ waited till everything wuz finished before he made man, cause He knows man will lie and brag on hisself tuh uh woman. Man ain’t found out yet how things wuz made—he ain’t meant tuh know.

  —JAMES PRESLEY.

  When God first put folks on earth there wasn’t no difference between men and women. They was all alike. They did de same work and everything. De man got tired uh fussin ’bout who gointer do this and who gointer do that.

  So he went up tuh God and ast him tuh give him power over de woman so dat he could rule her and stop all dat arguin’.

  He ast Him tuh give him a lil mo’ strength and he’d do de heavy work and let de woman jus’ take orders from him whut to do. He tole Him he wouldn’t mind doing de heavy [work] if he could jus’ boss de job. So de Lawd done all he ast Him and he went on back home—and right off he started tuh bossin’ de woman uh-round.

  So de woman didn’t lak dat a-tall. So she went up tuh God and ast Him how come He give man all de power and didn’t leave her none. So He tole her, “You never ast Me for none. I though
t you was satisfied.”

  She says, “Well, I ain’t, wid de man bossin’ me round lak he took tuh doin’ since you give him all de power. I wants half uh his power. Take it away and give it tuh me.”

  De Lawd shook His head. He tole her, “I never takes nothin’ back after I done give it out. It’s too bad since you don’t like it, but you shoulda come up wid him, then I woulda ’vided it half and half!”

  De woman was so mad she left dere spittin’ lak a cat. She went straight tuh de devil. He tole her: “I’ll tell you whut to do. You go right back up tuh God and ast Him tuh give you dat bunch uh keys hangin’ by de mantle shelf; den bring ’em here tuh me and I’ll tell you whut to do wid ’em, and you kin have mo’ power than man.”

  So she did and God give ’em tuh her thout uh word and she took ’em back tuh de devil. They was three keys on dat ring. So de devil tole her whut they was. One was de key to de bedroom and one was de key to de cradle and de other was de kitchen key. He tole her not tuh go home and start no fuss, jus’ take de keys and lock up everything an’ wait till de man come in—and she could have her way. So she did. De man tried tuh ack stubborn at first. But he couldn’t git no peace in de bed and nothin’ tuh eat, an’ he couldn’t make no generations tuh follow him unless he use his power tuh suit de woman. It wasn’t doin’ him no good tuh have de power cause she wouldn’t let ’im use it lak he wanted tuh. So he tried tuh dicker wid her. He said he’d give her half de power if she would let him keep de keys half de time.

  De devil popped right up and tole her naw, jus’ keep whut she got and let him keep whut he got. So de man went back up tuh God, but He tole him jus’ lak he done de woman.

  So he ast God jus’ tuh give him part de key tuh de cradle so’s he could know and be sure who was de father of chillun, but God shook His head and tole him: “You have tuh ast de woman and take her word. She got de keys and I never take back whut I give out.”

  So de man come on back and done lak de woman tole him for de sake of peace in de bed. And thass how come women got de power over mens today.

  —OLD MAN DRUMMOND.

  God done pretty good when He made man, but He could have made us a lot more convenient. For instance: we only got eyes in de front uh our heads—we need some in de back, too, so nuthin’ can’t slip upon us. Nuther thing: it would be handy, too, ef we had one right on de end uv our dog finger (first finger). Den we could jest point dat eye any which way. Nuther thing: our mouths oughter be on top uv our heads ’stead uh right in front. Then, when I’m late tuh work I kin just throw my breakfast in my hat, an’ put my hat on my head, an’ eat my breakfast as I go on tuh work. Now, ain’t dat reasonable, Miss? Besides, mouths ain’t so pretty nohow.

  —GEORGE BROWN.

  One day Christ wuz going along wid His disciples an’ He tole ’em all tuh pick up uh rock an’ bring it along. All of ’em got one, but Peter happened tuh be sorta tired dat day, so he picked up uh pebble an’ toted it.

  When Christ got where He wuz going, He stopped under de shade of uh tree an’ ast de disciples where wuz they rocks. They all showed ’em an’ He turned ’em all tuh bread an’ they set down an’ et. Peter didn’t have nothin’ but uh pebble, so he didn’t hardly have uh bite uh bread, an’ he wuz hungry. He didn’t lak de way things wuz goin’ uh bit, neither.

  Another time after dat, Jesus tole ’em all, “Well, we’se goin’ for another walk t’day, an’ I wants you all tuh bring long uh rock.”

  Peter wuzn’t goin’ tuh get left dis time, so he tore down half a mountain. He couldn’t tote it, so he moved it along wid a pinch bar, but he wagged all day wid it till way after while Christ rested under uh tree. Then Christ said, “All right, now, everybody bring up yo’ rocks.” They did, and here come Peter wid his half a mountain. He turned round an’ looked at all de rocks de disciples had done brought, an’ He smiled when He saw de big, fine rock Peter had done toted, an’ He said: “Peter, on dis rock I’m gointer build my church…”

  Peter said, “Naw you ain’t, neither! I be damned if you is. You gointer turn dis rock intuh bread.”

  Christ did it, too. Den He took de leben other rocks an’ stuck ’em together an’ built His church on it, an’ that’s how come churches split up so much t’day (built on a pieced-up rock).

  —CLIFFERT ULMER.

  People wuz on earth uh long time, den God says He reckon He better give ’em something tuh do tuh keep ’em outa mischief. So He put two boxes down ’bout uh mile up de road and tole ’em, says they could race for de prizes. De nigger out run de white man, but he wuz so tired dat he run fell up ’ginst de big box an’ says: “Ah got it! Ah got de biggest one! Dis’n’s mine! Ah got here first.”

  De white man says, “All right, I’ll take yo’ leavin’s.” He went and picked up de little box. He opened it an’ it had uh pen an’ ink an’ some writin’ paper. De nigger opened his an’ it had uh ax an’ grubbin’-hoe an’ plow an’ sich ez dat. De nigger been workin’ hard ever since an’ de white man been settin’ down bossin’ ’im.

  —LARKINS WHITE.

  Why Negroes Have Nothing†

  After God thew makin’ de world an’ rested Hisself uh little He called all de different nations uh people (races) up tuh Him an’ ast ’em all whut dey wanted. De white man said he wanted tuh be pretty an’ tuh boss everything; de Jew said he wanted all de money an’ wealth; de Indian said he wanted tuh know all about rovin’ de woods an’ huntin’ an’ sich. De nigger didn’t even come up tuh ast fuh nothin’. He wuz off somewhere restin’. Finally, God got tired uh waitin’ an’ sent one uh His angels tuh wake ’im up an’ tell ’im tuh come on up an’ git his, whutever he wanted.

  He went on up an’ God ast ’im, say, “Negro, whut do you want? Ah’m givin’ de nations whutever dey wants, but dis is yo’ las’ chance. Now you better look all roun’ an’ see whut you want me tuh give yuh.”

  De nigger never moved out his tracks. He said, “Ah don’t want nothin’,” and went on back tuh sleep.

  Thass how come we ain’t got nothin’.

  —LARKINS WHITE.

  Why Negroes are Black†

  The reason Negroes are black is because in the beginning God told everybody to be there at a certain time and get they color. Everybody went back at the right time but the Negroes. They went off somewhere and went to sleep. When they did get there they wuz so skeered they wouldn’t get waited on they started to pushing and shoving and acting crazy, and God pushed them back and said, “Get back!” They misunderstood and got black.

  —CHARLEY BRADLEY.

  Uncle Ike in DE Judgment†

  Once an old man named Ike died and went to judgment. It was the great day and all the people in the world were coming up to be judged; but they were being judged by races—the whites, the yellow, the Indians and the blacks.

  Ike used to work for some particular white folks and they had always taught him to be on time; so he was up at the throne dead on time. He saw the whites judged and sent to their doom or reward, then Gabriel turned over a new page for the Chinese and so on till everybody had been judged except the Negroes. They hadn’t got to judgment yet. Gabriel turned over a new page for Negroes and called for them to come to the throne. Uncle Ike, he went on up and told the Lord that his race wasn’t there, but he wanted to be judged; but the Lord told him he would have to wait until his race got there. He didn’t judge by individuals. So Ike stood one side and waited.

  God had two hours to wait; then he saw a great cloud of dust and He pushed Ike to one side so that he could see better. It was the colored folks coming to judgment. When they got up to the throne, God breathed on them and they said: “Just give us anything you got—hell or heaven, but let us all go on together.”

  Us Negroes are just like crabs, you know. One can’t get away from the rest; do, they’ll pull him right back.

  After they got quieted down, God judged them and said that He was sorry, but He had to send them all to hell because they were so late. Some of them cried; som
e of them begged Him to change His mind; and some of them said that they didn’t care one or the other. When Ike heard the judgment he made God remember that he had been there on time, even before anybody had been judged; and God said that He thought He would have to give Ike some consideration, but He was wondering what to do with Ike when all the rest of the Negroes would be gone to hell.

  Then all the Negroes began to holler and shout, “Let him come on wid us! He’s a nigger just like us. How come he don’t want to come on to hell with us? That’s just like some old niggers—always trying to get away from their race! He come up here way ahead of time trying to pass for white, and if he ain’t trying to pass, he’s trying to act like white folks. Make him come on wid de rest of us, God.”

  God told them that Ike was on time and so He felt that He must fix him some place in heaven; but the colored folks set up such a racket that they woke up saints that had been sleep for thousands of years—way back in the back rooms of heaven, and they came out to see what was the trouble. God couldn’t stand all that racket so He told them all to go on to hell where He had assigned them, but they didn’t want to leave Ike up there. God sent a band of angels to shoo them on out, but some of the last ones grabbed Ike and dragged him on with them.

  So you see, even on judgment day Negroes won’t let one another get nowhere. We are too much like crabs.

  —LOUISE NOBLE.

  God made de cabbage and stood dere wid de hoe over his shoulder. And de Devil saw him, so he said he was going to make him a field of cabbage just like God. So he made it, but he couldn’t git it straight and it made tobacco. So that’s how come we got tobacco today.

  —MRS. ANNIE KING.

  Dere wuz once uh man an’ he didn’t count* nobody, not even God. So one day his son wuz out in de field and de lightning struck ’im. De man come running out de house hollering, “Don’t come killing my son, pick on me, my shoulders is broad. I bet I’ll take an…” Jes about dat time he got struck himself—not uh big stroke, jes enough tuh burn him uh little and skeer ’im. So he said, “Umph! God don’t stand no joking dese days.